A Portrait 末段重新閱讀及翻譯
這是我很喜歡的小說末段中主人翁的告白,我經常性的閱讀這本小說,一次又一次算來三遍閱畢。這是很好自我檢視的方法,隨著時間推移,某些理想必然受到衝擊,但受到打壓並不表示它不存在?是吧。藉着回頭閱讀這些文字,羞愧的哭泣或那些熱情又被激動起,才知道這是條可以走的路,因為你知道燃料還足夠。
“I will not serve that in which I no longer believe, whether it call itself my home, my fatherland or my church: and I will try to express myself in some mode of life or art as freely as I can and as wholly as I can, using for my defence the only arms I allow myself to use — silence, exile, and cunning.”
“那些自稱為國家、家以及信仰等諸多我不再相信的,我將背離它們而去:而我會透過各種形式的生活或藝術形態,自由和完全的表述,並靠著我僅有而問心無愧的武器捍衛自己──沉默,放逐,狡猾。”
“You made me confess the fears that I have. But I will tell you also what I do not fear. I do not fear to be alone or to be spurned for another or to leave whatever I have to leave. And I am not afraid to make a mistake, even a great mistake, a lifelong mistake and perhaps as long as eternity too.”
“你要我對你坦承我的恐懼。但我告訴你什麼我無所畏懼,我不害怕孤獨或是被輕蔑對待或逃離我必須要逃的,而且我不害怕犯錯,即便鑄下大錯,甚至一輩子無法挽救的錯誤。”
原文摘自A Portrait of The Artist as A Young Man — James Joyce